5 Years Alcohol Free
5 Years Alcohol-Free: What Worked, What Didn't, and Why I'd Never Go Back
Looking back it wasn't just brave, it was the best decision I've ever made.
Five years ago, on the 6th of May 2020, I made a decision that changed everything.
I didn’t feel like I’d hit rock bottom, but my drinking was making me feel completely miserable, stuck in a vicious cycle I couldn’t seem to break free from—and I was finally ready to be honest enough with myself to admit it.
I didn’t consider myself an alcoholic—I was a classic example of grey area drinking. I was drinking much more than I wanted to, stuck in a cycle that so many of us face on our sobriety journey. And it was draining the life out of me.
I Thought the Problem Was Me.
My struggle to control my drinking had been going on for years.
I believed I was weak, broken, a failure – lacking will-power.
That if I just tried harder, I should be able to be a ‘normal’ drinker.
That not being able to control my drinking like everyone else, meant I was a ‘problem drinker’ and everyone would judge me.
But what I was really afraid of? Letting go of the one thing I’d come to rely on to make me feel better.
I didn’t realise it at the time, but alcohol wasn’t solving anything. It was numbing everything. Including me.
The Early Days: Yes, It Was Hard
I’m not going to sugar-coat it.
In the early days, it was hard.
I missed my wine in the evenings.
I felt a bit awkward in social settings.
I struggled and questioned my decision pretty much on a daily basis.
There were moments I felt very emotional (angry, resentful, disappointed), and came close to throwing the towel in.
That’s the nature of addiction—your brain will do everything it can to pull you back in.
But deep down, something in me knew:
If I wanted to feel better, I had to get through the rough days—not avoid or distract from it.
So I did.
And slowly, things began to shift.
I stopped waking up at 3am with anxiety and regret.
The cravings got weaker and easier to conquer.
The mental noise quietened.
And in its place? A quiet kind of confidence I’d never felt before.
It didn’t happen overnight. But it did happen.
And it was worth every uncomfortable moment.
What Actually Worked (and What Didn’t)
Let’s get real:
· What didn’t work?
· Un-helpful negative self-talk.
· White knuckling
· Isolation
· Focusing on how hard it all was
What did work?
Learning how to pause, allow and process cravings
Rewiring my brain on what I believed about alcohol—and what it actually gave me (which as it turned out was sweet FA!)
Making peace with discomfort, instead of avoiding it
Making small but accumulative shifts around my habits, routines, and mindsets
Building confidence through taking action, not waiting to “feel ready”
Five Years On: Here’s What I Wish I'd Known Then:
You don’t have to be at rock bottom to make changes.
The bravest thing you’ll ever do is tell yourself the truth.
Freedom comes when you stop outsourcing your peace to something that’s stealing it.
Real change doesn’t happen overnight—but it does happen.
The version of you who feels clear, calm, and in control? She’s already in there. You just need to give her a chance.
What’s Next?
This blog kicks off a five-part series of sobriety tools and mindset shifts that supported me in building an alcohol-free life I love —not just for a few months, but for good.
Simple, powerful shifts that helped me change my relationship with alcohol—and myself.
Next Week: The most powerful tool I accidently discovered in one of my worst moments.
Ready to Take Your First Step?
📥 Download my free guide: The 5 Step Alcohol-Free Reset
A practical, powerful place to start—no shame, no overwhelm, just a new way forward.
"Ready to dive in?"
If you’re ready for a deeper kind of support, I offer powerful 1:1 coaching sessions fully focused on your total well-being. No fluff—just real support, tailored to YOU.
📝 Disclaimer:
The content on this blog is for informational and inspirational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. I am an Accredited Sober Coach, Nutrition Coach and Life Coach, but I am not a medical professional. If you are concerned about your health, mental wellbeing, or alcohol use, please speak with your GP or a qualified healthcare provider.
