Sobriety Truth Bombs Pt 1 - How I Stopped My Vicious Drinking Cycle (And Finally Felt Better Without Alcohol)
If you’re anything like I was, you’re not lying awake at 3am full of anxiety because you can’t find a good alcohol-free sav blanc.
It’s more likely you’re feeling the turmoil that comes from knowing that drinking isn’t working for you anymore.
It’s an actual waking nightmare lying awake feeling so bloody tired from constantly trying to be better.
Trying to drink less.
Trying to be “good” during the week.
Trying to convince yourself you’ll snap out of it - it’s just a phase.
In those dark times, it’s difficult to see the truth - but once you do, you can’t unsee it.
Ready?
Ok...deep breath… let’s go!
Sobriety Truth Bomb #1.
The science is clear—especially for midlife women: there is no “safe” amount of alcohol when it comes to hormonal health, cancer risk, or menopause symptoms.
Even light drinking nudges up your breast cancer risk, makes hot flashes worse, messes with sleep, and chips away at bone density.
Read More About Cancer Risk Hormonal Sensitivity
For years, I’d built this whole story around wine being a perfectly acceptable way to cope. (Hell, I'd even convinced myself that bottle of red I'd knocked back was 'good for my heart'!)
Long day? Wine.
Overwhelmed? Wine.
Doing everything for everyone and getting nothing back? Wine.
And the biggest one? Feeling a sense of emptiness... yes, you guessed it - Wine.
It was the reward. The familiar friend. The thing that made it all feel…well, better.
Except—I wasn’t feeling better.
I was grumpy, knackered, and anxious most of the time… and permanently recovering from a hangover.
If alcohol was supposed to be helping me cope - why the heck wasn’t I coping?
And I really wasn’t. I was just pushing down everything I didn’t want to feel.
And bit by bit, I was losing the ability to deal with real life without a glass in my hand.
SELF COACHING PROMPT
“If wine was really helping me cope… why do I feel miserable and like I’m running on empty most of the time?”
Sobriety Truth Bomb #2.
The Real Psychology Behind Why You Can’t Stop Drinking
(It’s not what you think)
If you’d asked me why I couldn’t stop drinking, I would’ve rattled off a list:
“I just need something for me.”
“I’m not drinking that much anyway.”
“I can’t be sociable without it.”
And I believed it all - believed I was being honest with myself.
But I wasn’t.
What I was actually doing was running a clever mental loop—justifying what I didn’t want to change.
I wasn’t stuck. I was just avoiding the truth.
When your actions and values clash—like knowing alcohol’s not helping, but drinking anyway—your brain steps in with rationalisations to protect you from the discomfort. It’s called cognitive dissonance.
And the longer you run those stories, the more believable they feel. (ScienceDirect)
This is not a sign of weakness - it’s a sign that you are a normal human being.
And human beings don’t particularly like changing the belief systems they’ve had for years and years.
As a coach, I often see that real transformation isn’t just about changing what you do – it’s about changing what you believe.
If you’ve been stuck in the same cycle for years, chances are it’s not your willpower that’s the problem.
It’s the beliefs running quietly in the background, shaping every choice you make.
The good news?
Beliefs are not facts – they’re mental habits.
And like any habit, they can be changed with awareness, consistent action, and the right tools.
SELF COACHING PROMPT
“What BS stories am I spinning to make it sound reasonable to keep drinking—and would I believe them if someone else said them to me?”
Sobriety Truth Bomb #3.
Moderation Is Keeping You Stuck! The Hidden Cost of “Drinking Less”
This was the bit that took me far too long to understand.
I wasn’t getting drunk every night.
I wasn’t missing work.
I wasn’t “out of control.”
I was just constantly negotiating with myself.
“I’ll only drink on weekends.”
“Just two glasses.”
“Only with a meal.”
“Not two nights in a row.”
Except the negotiations never stopped.
Every day was another mental game of “Can I? Should I? Will I?”
Moderation sounds like freedom—but it’s not.
It’s just more socially acceptable and easier to explain than stopping.
You're still thinking about alcohol all the time.
Still planning around it. Still regretting it. Still feeling guilty.
That’s not freedom.
That’s a commitment to focusing on staying trapped.
So if you believe you’ll find the peace you long for by drinking less…
You might need to ask whether the peace you’re chasing is even possible while alcohol is still in the picture.
SELF COACHING PROMPT
“If I stopped playing the “just one” game tomorrow, how much headspace, energy, and actual peace would I get back?”
These truth bombs aren’t here to shame you—they’re here to wake you up.
And if they hit a nerve?
Good. That means you’re ready for change.
Which one landed for you the hardest?
Let me know HERE
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📝 Disclaimer:
The content on this blog is for informational and inspirational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. I am an Accredited Sober Coach, Certified Nutrition Coach and Life Coach, but I am not a medical professional. If you are concerned about your health, mental wellbeing, or alcohol use, please speak with your GP or a qualified healthcare provider.
