I made a promise... to never give away my power again.

Sobriety changes you on an energetic level. You might become much more aware of what feels in alignment with who you're becoming.

It can feel a bit unsettling, because you might not feel comfortable with aspects of your life that you've just gone along with - out of habit, keeping the peace or because it's what everyone else is doing.

This last few months I've spent more time on social media than ever - I think it's mostly due to being stuck at home so much. And to begin with it felt good... gave me a wee dopamine boost when I was feeling a bit fed up with myself.

But, lately it's been feeling very different - and so similar to how my drinking crept up on me.

Picking up my phone just because it was there... getting online for one thing only to get distracted by the socials and half an hour later (or an hour if I'm honest), forgetting why the hell I picked up my phone in the first place.

And then my 'rock bottom' moment - the O/H and I deciding to watch a film and half an hour in, we’re both scrolling and neither of us could remember what the hell happened in the film!!!!

There's a bit of a lightbulb moment for most people when they've quit drinking for a good chunk of time... the realisation that alcohol was much more in control than they thought. Then there's the anger that comes with that, well, it did for me at least.

Don’t know about you, but being pissed off about something can put a bit of a fire under my butt.

I made a promise to myself that I would not give my power away like that again.

Yet, there I was, unaware, numb and energetically drained - all due to a 7x14 cm piece of technology having all my power. WTF???

I tested the concept of moderation which worked for a few days - surprise, surprise.

Then I removed all social media apps from my phone.

This has caused much resistance in my brain and discomfort in my body - which fascinates me to no end - yet those feelings are simply evidence that I needed to make a change.

I was talking to a client recently about creating natural, healthy dopamine hits and was so inspired when they rattled off different activities that made them feel energised or relaxed, motivated or peaceful. Focusing on the feelings they had believed alcohol created for them in the past.

They inspired me (which happens a lot with my amazing clients), and I can’t believe how easy it’s been to tune into my own ideas when I’m not wasting time scrolling.

I’m doing more reading, journaling, writing, creating, cooking, planning, even stretching for goodness sakes.

There are even times when I simply sit and do some appreciating!

Now, there’s a novel way to pass time that makes you feel bloody good.

Most social media is built for speed and distraction and I’m more interested in slower, deeper conversations these days than trying to keep up with the endless stream of posts flying by.

I feel much more aligned with Substack which is where I’ll be sharing my insights about life on the bright side of sobriety going forward.

Just like the shift that’s happening around alcohol, I believe that we are slowly beginning to shift from addictive, energy draining digital media.

And I’m ready to take the next step in my quest to become someone who doesn’t look for happiness or peace from anywhere but within.

Are you?